Since informing our church, we have had several conversations with people who want to give us advice on what to do. This ranges from people who think we should not go to Chicago (at least not at first) to people who have a very specific way that they think we should church plant. I think most of these people are well intentioned. They are trying to help. They are not helping.
The Plan
This is not going to be a short blog. Our decision to go to Chicago was not made overnight. God has been preparing us for many years, and most of that time we did not even know where it was leading. So to effectively communicate God's plan I must communicate my journey. When I got married my journey turned into our journey. I say that because what you read today will be my side of our part of the journey. My wife has a story of her journey before me and how our journey looks to her. I cannot share that with you. It is her story to tell.
No Paper Towels
I went to college at a Christian university in the Chicago suburbs, but it wasn't my first choice. In reality it wasn't even my choice. My first choice was a different Christian university in the middle of nowhere in upstate New York. I was accepted. I went to orientation. The school gave me a laptop. Everything was great. Then I went to the bathroom.
Okay this is going to sound weird, but I decided not to go this university because they had forced air blowers in the bathrooms. It was about a month before classes started and I was there for a conference. I began to get really annoyed that I couldn't dry my hands with paper towels. It was insane. I felt insane. I didn't know why this bothered me so much.
After talking to my pastor, and some mentors, and praying -- a lot -- I concluded that this was God's way of telling me that I shouldn't go there. The problem was that we were weeks away from college season and I had nowhere to go. I applied to the Education program at a school outside of Chicago. I got an interview and I was accepted. All this happened a week before they started classes. I am convinced that my admittance to this college was God's plan. I know God wanted me there. I know God wanted me there, because it was there that I got my first hint about church planting in Chicago. But I should back up.
The Lake
My senior year of high school I had an experience that I will never forget. It solidified in my mind that God is indeed good. To understand this experience you need to know that I hear from God. Not audible like you normally think (although that did happen once), but more like a voice in my head. This started a while before my senior year, but what you need to understand is I didn't trust it at first. Frankly I still have days where I think I'm crazy, but that is why the lake is so important to me.
Anyway, my senior year I got a job at a restaurant. I worked the night shift. I would drive home in the dark. I knew the way, but I started hearing God tell me to take different ways home. It was G.od P.ositioning S.ystem. God would say, turn left or turn right. Some nights I ignored it. I figured I was just tired. But eventually I began to listen to it. God was training me to hear His voice.
One night I was driving home and my God Positioning System took me way out of the way. God had me drive to an RV sales place. At night. In the dark. In rural America. I pulled into the gravel parking lot and God said "Get out of the car." Now I'm freaked out. Everyone has a shotgun. I'm thinking God is crazy. I'm going to get out of this car and and a guy is going to come out of that trailer (the sales office was a trailer) and shoot me in the face. "Get out of the car." Alright God, but my death is on you.
I got out of the car and noticed there was a lake with a dock. "Go out on the dock." Nope. Not doing it. There is totally a guy with a gun in that trailer. I am not walking by that trailer and getting shot. "Go out on the dock." Fine. I walked out on the dock and looked at the lake. I looked like ebony or glass. There was not a single ripple on the water. It took my breath away. I remember it being the most peaceful thing I have ever seen. My heart and my mind were racing and full of chaos, but the lake was nothing but peace. "See how peaceful that water is. That is the peace I will give you if you just listen to me." I got back in my car and drove home. I will never forget that lake.
The Chapel Service
My whole life I fought with God about being a pastor. There are a lot of reasons for that. What they boil down to is that I wanted to know for sure that I was called and not just following the example of my father and grandfather. My confrontation came to a head my senior year of college. It was then that I finally decided that I would be a pastor. I was unsure what that meant though.
The college that I went to required students to go to chapel. I had managed to get out of the requirement by working for the maintenance department of the school. I'm not sure why exactly I was in chapel that day. What I do know is that I was arguing with God about what churches look like and where I should go to church. It was during some hymn or praise chorus that God gave me an answer. "Look Phil. This is your church." I looked and saw all the other students worshiping God. At the time I took that to mean that I should go to chapel more. But like many revelations of God it had multiple meanings. More on that later.
My Bride -- Our Journey
By the time I met my bride I already knew that God wanted me to plant a church in Chicago. My bride has always had a heart for the nations. That could be a problem. God wasn't calling me to Pakistan or China or Zambia. God was calling me to Chicago. We knew that if we were going to become one, our vision from God needed to become one. This meant lots of prayer. Prayer together. Prayer separately.
I can't tell you everything that my wife talked to God about. What I can tell you is that I had to give up on a personal dream -- for the second time. All I ever really wanted was to be a husband and a father. When I got divorced that dream was crushed. When I met my bride that dream was rekindled. But when we talked about our future, I had to give up that dream. I knew that God wanted me to build His church in Chicago. That meant that anyone I partnered with would also have to have that vision. I began to realize it might mean that I would have to kill my dream of being a husband and father.
God is good. After weeks of prayer we both concluded that God wanted us (not just me) to go to Chicago. My wife learned of the diversity of Chicago. Her heart for the nations didn't have to mean going to the nations. The nations were already coming to Chicago.
The Plan (What We Know)
As I said in the beginning, this is God's plan. That means a lot of things for my wife and I. What it means for you is that we cannot tell you everything. We just don't know. We may not know until we get to Chicago. We may find that the final step is really just the first step. There are many unknowns, but the most important thing is known. God is good. His plans are perfect. Our job is to trust and obey.
We know that it will not be easy. It feels like some people think this is a whim. We keep having people remind us that church planting is hard. All I can ever think is that they have forgotten my first wife cheated on me. Or that I see people die in the hospital on a monthly basis. These are certainly not church planting, but they aren't easy. I get through them by putting my faith in God. It's not just me that knows this. My wife does too, but that is her story to tell.
We know that God is preparing us now for Chicago. I hope that the story of my journey showed you how God has been preparing me for this my whole life. That preparation continues. I understand that some people want us to be fully ready for Chicago before we go, but that is just never the case. What we do know is that God is using the next two years to make preparations. In Jewish customs you work to prepare for the Sabbath. We are in that time right now. God has called us to make ourselves ready. The Sabbath comes whether or not you feel prepared for it. Our time to go to Chicago is coming soon. We cannot put it off because we're not sure that we are ready.
We know that Chicago would not be our choice. I think this might be the hardest one for you to understand. If we chose our preferred church planting area it would be Denver, or Hawaii, or the South of Spain. The truth is church planting is not our desire, it is our calling. We have prayed and discussed and argued and it always comes back to Chicago. We cannot escape it. I am a servant of the King. I serve at the pleasure of the King. If the King asks me to go into battle without weapons, I do it. Not because I fear the King, but because I love Him. My King is a good King. He is the only good king. That was the lesson of the lake. I may not understand what God is doing now. I may not even like it right now, but if I just trust Him I will be presented with beauty and peace. And that is not instead of the chaos, but in the midst of the chaos.
We know that God can do anything. I can give you an example from scripture and from my own life where God has done the impossible. Why should I doubt? Sure, I may not be able to see how something can be done, but that doesn't matter. Sarah had a kid when she was 91 years old. She was 66 when she was told. She waited 25 years for God to fulfill His promise.
We know that God's heart is for the nations. God's mission has always been about redeeming the world. The blessing of Abraham was so that the world would be blessed. Solomon dedicates the temple and prays that the nations would come and worship YHWH. Jesus comes for the sheep of a different fold. Peter preaches to Cornelius. Paul gives a sermon to pagans about their unknown god.
We know that our church will be diverse. If God's heart is for the nations then our church should be for the nations. We're not sure exactly what that looks like, but we know that God will bring clarity.
We know that our church will be for the broken and the outcasts. One of the things that God told me early on is that He wanted me to minister to people who have been hurt by the church. One of the first things my wife told me is that God wanted her to "awaken the dead church." There are so many who have rejected God because of the church. We want our church to be a place of healing and reconciliation.
We know that our church will be for college students. This was part of what God revealed to me that day in chapel. My church was to be intentional about ministering to and working with college students. College is the time when people start to solidify their identity. This is a crucial time to speak life into someone. There are so many broken people and outcasts on college campuses.
We know this will be God's church. One of the easiest things to do as a church planter is to take ownership of a church. (Now that I think of it that is a danger for any Christian.) This church will not be our church. God is already building a church in Chicago. It is God who called us. It is God who brings the people. It is God who changes their hearts. We are blessed that God chooses to partner with us in building His church.
This is the part where every missionary asks you for money. I'm not going to do that. Not because we don't need it. Not because we don't have debt. But because this isn't about us. This is about God. God called us to Chicago. God will provide. I just got done saying that God can do anything. Either I believe that or I don't. What you can do is pray.
Pray that we continue to receive God's plan for us. We know there is more to be revealed. We know that we will receive more before we move to Chicago. We need you to pray that our ears are opened to hearing it.
Pray that we are not crippled by the enemy. Satan does not want us to plant a church. He wants to cripple us with fear. He wants to distract us from the things that matter. He wants to cause divisions and conflict. He wants to make it impossible financially, socially, legally, practically, and so many other ways. But nothing is impossible for our God.
Pray that doors are opened to us. Right now we are trying to figure out exactly where God wants us. There are so many things to consider. Chicagoland is a big place. We need you to pray that doors are opened so we see where His is already moving and where we can partner with Him most effectively.
Pray that God prepares the place for us. We can go to Chicago and we can preach the gospel. We can plant the seed, but God makes it grow. Part of God making the seed grow is preparing the ground. God needs to bring the rain so the earth is soft and full of nutrients for the planted seed.
Pray that God brings the right people. We cannot do this on our own. We need people strong in the faith to build God's church with us. I have experience in Chicago, but I know we will need more people who can help. We don't need just anyone, we need the right people. The wrong person can sow division and chaos. Pray that God brings people of peace.
Pray for strength and wisdom. This is not going to be easy. We will need supernatural strength to get through. We will need wisdom to direct our path.
Pray for Chicago. If nothing else, pray for the city of Chicago and it's suburbs. It is a city plagued by death, deceit, and destruction. Chicago is also a city full of people made in the image of God. We have a heart for the broken. We have a heart for people to hear of their Savior. We know that the people of Chicago desperately need the gospel.
May you come to know the calling of God on your life. May you come to see that God has a heart for the nations. May you love the community that your church is in. May you work the field. And may God bring the harvest.
Amen!
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